I suppose not EVERYONE's existence needs to be justifed ...

I did an experiment tonight.

I came to work ten minutes early, sat down at my desk, and decided to see how long it would actually take me to complete my nightly duties.

First, keep in mind that I work roughly twelve hours a night (my shift goes from 8:30 p.m. to 8:30 a.m., give or take), and I generally stretch out these duties over that entire time in order to avoid being burdened with whatever other useless tasks my supervisors dream up.

So, tonight I thought I'd see exactly how much time I really needed to complete my job.

And I figured it out!

Wanna know how long?

Actually, you might want to prepare yourselves for this. Go ahead, take a few deep breaths, I'll wait.

It took ...

FORTY-FIVE MINUTES.

Yep. Really. Seriously, read it again!

FORTY-FIVE MINUTES.

So what am I doing for the other eleven hours and fifteen minutes of my shift?

Well, I'll give you a hint: it rhymes with "ducking a ground."

And sometimes "fleeping."

And sometimes "pluthing."

I feel so needed.

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Speaking of useless tasks dreamed up by my supervisors -- waaaay up there [pointing] -- one of them must have had a bitch of a nightmare last night, because there are now approximately thirtrillion boxes of little information cards on our table, and guess who gets to be a part of counting them out and preparing them for distribution to people who will probably just throw them away immediately?

You guessed it! I can't wait!

This is going to be SO MUCH FUN. And USEFUL. And PRODUCTIVE. And WORTHWHILE. And INTERESTING.

And A GIANT LOAD OF BULLSHIT.

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I had a lovely conversation with the dashing, debonaire, valiant and verbose Michael last night, in which it was established that if Husband does anything else of the "stupid asshole human tricks" variety, Things Can Be Done about that.

Do you hear that, Husband? If you are indeed reading this for the second time in your life?

Eh. Probably not.

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And now, because I have nothing else to say and I think it's about damn time I posted a photo here, I give you:

Random Artsy Night Shot of the Row of Trailers in Which I Live

Thank you! I'll be here till January! Be sure to tip your waitress!