Baghdad -- the jet-setter's best-kept secret

Way #328476 to Annoy the Living Shit Out of Your Boss:

Watch your brand new Bob Dylan documentary just loud enough for Dylan’s voice to jerk him out of his deep sleep during every musical performance, but quiet enough to allow him to slip back into slumberland between songs.

Because, really, what can he do?

“DAMMIT! Why are you shirking work in a louder way than I am??”

“Umm …”

“Shut up! Turn that shit off and go to sleep!”

“Roger, sir.”

Come on, now. The chances of that happening are, what, 60/40?

Most likely he’d just hand me some headphones, lean back and close his eyes.

See, working nights at a worthless job in an office building in a combat zone can have its benefits!

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I want to thank EVERY SINGLE PERSON I READ for updating today.

God only knows what I would have done for the past five hours without you all.

But you'll have to forgive me if my comments kind of suck. I get burned out after a few journals. After a while, I'm just, "Hahahahahaha. Fuuuuuunny." Or, "So sad. [Sob]" Or, "Interesting. Hmm."

So, yeah, if there's a comment from me like that on your site, that's because the sector of my brain which thinks up witty comments just needs to sleep sometimes. Nothing personal.

I would just refrain from comment (which I do sometimes), but I'm just OCD enough to have to write something but what should I write the creativity is GONE. GONE BUT MUST WRITE AAAAH!

I'm sure you understand.

[EDIT] Okay, I don't ALWAYS comment. But usually that doesn't mean I'm not reading. I still love you guys, but sometimes (and this is going to be hard to believe -- I swear it's true!) I just don't have anything to say, or can't think of a way to say it. And that's just the way it goes. Smooches! [/EDIT]

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Did you know that Iraq is the Next Hot Tourist Spot?

No??

That's so funny; I didn't either!

But apparently, the good folks at the Bradt Travel Book Publishing Place thought they had the scoop, back in 2002.

Yep, it seems that they instinctively knew how many people were going to want to flock to the Cradle of Civilization in the next few years, so they sent one of their top Travel Book Writers to this beautiful country o' evil dictatorship to do a little write-up.

The finished product was this:

Not too shabby, if I do say so, myself. But somebody thought its original copy needed a little bit of touching up. So they made a few changes, and went to press ...

That's right!

Welcome to Beautiful Baghdad, now 100% Saddam-free! We invite you to visit our lovely palaces ... but you might want to watch out for those holes.